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Quest Journals

Whole Unto Myself

I recently experienced a huge shift that put into perspective every relationship I’ve ever had.

One that allows me to see each being I care for as a whole person, one who is on their own path of growth and journey to God. But in order to honor and love them in their fullness, I must first recognize it within. This allows me to give and receive love in a new way than ever before.. from wholeness.

Being able to love without the fear of lack, the feeling that the other is my source for opening to God.. or that I need to reach out to them for anything to connect with my own sense of wholeness.

Instead I am able to remember that I am love, that I am fine whether they come or whether they go, that I can let love flow through me.. to remember the truth that I am love.. and love comes from everywhere and everything. That is my eternal nature, and that is the source of my fullness. To remember that I am good.. And, as people continue to pass in and out of my life, this belief allows me to love them freely in a healthy way, with lots of space around it, lots of allowing whatever is to be, to be. Also allowing change and growth and shifting, basically allowing the nature of transformation.. and knowing all is perfect within.

I am embodying this now more then ever before. I am able to consciously remember, as I connect with beings I love with my entire soul, to allow them to be separate from me.. to not need anything from them, but to welcome the receiving of love as our dances and vibrations merge and come into alignment. This is a gift I am growing to accept more and more. I am expanding into it, and it has transmuted me from a place of co-dependency to a place of self-sufficiency. Now, I am grateful to feel more expanded and connected to the All with another person than I do when I am alone, but there is no craving because I am certain and aware of all the little packages Great Spirit brings love through. And beyond all this, because I am committed to my eternal source of connection within. This is how we fully access love. It is through listening to the songs of own souls, tuning to the wisdom of our own hearts, and trusting ourselves to guide our way on…

I also have faith that no matter what happens I will have my own back. Whatever falls apart, or takes place between individuals, I will be able to reconfigure myself if I am disappointed. I will stand by my own side. No longer will I guilt, shame, or abandon my true nature which is love.. an expression of the divine. No longer will I forget, but stand with courage and conviction knowing that I am a part of the circle of life and of this world. Knowing that I can ask for help from the Angels, my Guides and Ancestors, and that I will be listened to and brought into the flow.

The magical ingredient for knowing in my soul that I have this connection is the belief I am worthy of it. The belief that I am part of it all. That I choose to believe and tune to the wisdom that I have dharma, a role to play that is sacred, that serves creation. But what’s more is I am beyond these roles. I am a spark of light. I am worthy because of my existence. I have value, not because of my creations, but because of my willingness to show up and offer them. Through the giving, I am full. Through the service, I know I am alive, and that commitment to walk in True Alignment keeps me congruent, allows me to show up and walk with the confidence my Soul, Angels, and Higher Self have been urging me into bringing to this world during these cycles of transformation.

Because of the grace of the heavens, awareness of my energy, and choosing love by being open and vulnerable, I have shaken off apart of my defensive nature that protected my fragility. Only by letting go of the belief that we must be protected, that we are fragile.. and by releasing any mistrust of ourselves to handle heartbreak, can we find our strength and courageous warrior nature to let love flow through us and transform the world we live in into a much bigger picture than anyone we were could fathom ..before we let go of the old beliefs and let love through the door of our hearts to redecorate and feng shui the place.. ;)

Through my remembrance that change is constant, and my acceptance of this, I can be present for the sacred moments I share with another person. I am free to let them be free and this is the ingredient to experience love in a way that expands those it touches. It strengthens us. Love is a healing force that way. When we add control, or worry about outcomes, or any finite factors.. we are shifting away from the limitlessness that can be experienced through the timeless and eternal nature of cosmic love, which is expressive and able to be experienced through our connection to God, nature, and each other.

When we love another person, we are feeling that connection in our own hearts. When we feel connected to God that is experienced within us as well. Remember that our primary relationship is with the divine, but our experience of that is based on our relationship to ourselves. Once we are here in right remembrance and feel good about our value and connection to who we are, then we wear our external world much more loosely. We feel the expansive quality of love within. When I remember this I am free to love you and you feel free to love me right back. This chemistry fosters security and oneness in our connection. We are balanced in the duality between us being separate beings, but connected through the life force of Spirit that lives inside us. The love that exists between us and runs through us is eternal. It is a gift of our life force, our electricity, like blood coursing through our veins. This is our heart chakra when it is open and expanded to the love and joy it is purely able to experience. This is possible when grief has been cleared and forgiveness been given. The journey from grief to joy has been a great part of my experience…

When I am in right alignment, I worship and trust the universe. This brings me into connection with everything. I experience synchronicity, I hear my guides and angels clearly, I trust my decisions, my intuition. I listen to my soul, I make choices that expand rather than contract, and I feel the love of Mother Earth and God. 

Over time as I am unfolding, and my Higher Self reveals the beauty and great mystery of my ancient soul’s story, I am learning on a deeper and deeper level to love and approve of who I am as a being. As a fragment on Earth, a sparkle of light in the great cosmic web of souls that cross the globe. And this respect of self translates directly to the flow of gifts and miracles from the universe. The more pure my thoughts of my own being, the more light I see in the world around me. The more forgiveness, the more grace I experience.

I go through cycles of forgetting, and start to see myself as separate, but each time I am brought back to the remembrance of my own infinity, to the eternal nature of my being. I am deeply committed to keeping it my mantra, consciously running it through, fueling me like the blood in my veins.

We are all one, connected to each other. I am another you. I am sister, you are brother.. I will worship everything, and be connected through eternity. I am able to receive love willingly through surrender to believing that I am worthy and able just to be it. And through the giving.. I become it. I am embodied. 

Aho. Namaste. And so it is.

In love, light, and warrior spirit,

Michelle Infinity

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My mission is to walk in beauty, to live in tune with the cosmic rhythms of the earth and sky and provide healing tools for others to do the same. I restore harmony by helping people attune and connect to their own inner wisdom through my ritualistic healing work. Through prayer, song, my intuitive counseling practice, sharing conscious writings, media, and visual art, I am here to awaken others to the Infinite in Everything.

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About Quest Journals

Quest Journals are an opportunity for Shifters to share and document their own unfolding spiritual journey as part of the collective shift in consciousness. Personal introspections, visions and intentions, local Shiftivism adventures, community updates, dream journals, personal creations, art, poetry, music, videos, and more. This is a space for us to practice gonzo journalism and creating conscious media.

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